Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Baking Season

When I get into a baking mood, no one is safe. Cakes, pies, cookies, brownies, muffins, breads... I churn them out as fast as my oven can produce a golden flaky crust. At first my family thinks it's wonderful, all these goodies for them to snack on,  that I'm always in the kitchen, and available to chat. Then they realize I'm always in the kitchen... wanting to chat. Good grief, they only wanted a drink of water.
I've seen them reverse course and drink from the bathroom tap instead.
My friends think it's wonderful, when I show up to every social function with a plate of cookies, a pie, or a loaf of quirky artisan bread. Until I bring all the above, for a gathering of three people. "Take it to work with you, your co-workers will love it!" I say, as I skip out unburdened, racing home to try a new recipe, leaving their table weighed down with carbs galore.
I realized how bad it had gotten when I made several dozen chocolate chunk espresso brownies. And my daughter Sadie came in to tell me goodbye, because she was heading off to work.

Me: "You work with people, take some brownies!"
Sadie: "I barely know them. It would be weird."
Me: "What better way to make friends! I'll put some in a container."
Sadie: "No, I don't have time. I'm out the door."
Me (calling out): "No, look! I've already found a lid! Look! They're almost ready!"
Sadie (from the door): "Too late! Bye! I love you!"

Sadie was in her car pawing through her purse for her keys when the front door to the house opened.
She was unprepared for the horror walking out through that door.
There was her mother, in a SuperMom apron, holding a container of brownies.
The sweet loving smile on her mother's face was too much.
She was like a zombie. A brownie baking Mommy zombie.
The world moved in slow motion.
"Keys. Now."
She was getting closer.
Her mother was now next to the car. Sadie was out of time, out of options.

Sadie opened the car door.
Me: "Glad I caught you."
Sadie: "Yeah, I was trying to find my keys."
Me: "See? It worked out. Enjoy the brownies!"
Sadie: (deep sigh) "Thank you. I love you."