Thursday, July 30, 2009

Make Way for... Turklings

Drug Seeker

I was at drugstore chain X today and saw that a dietary supplement I normally buy (24/$6) was on sale- the large 60 ct box was 75% off (60/$2.75).
I asked for it and was told they were out of it. I had them call the other store and overheard this conversation:
"This is (name withheld) at drugstore chain X. Do you have dietary supplement in the 60 ct box, at 75% off? ..... Female..." He turned around and glanced at me, before quickly turning back, "30's?... Okay. Thanks!"

Yes, they had it.
I drove across town and walked directly to the back of the store and requested the dietary supplement, in the 60 ct box, at 75% off. The woman I spoke to said, "I don't think we have that."
"Yes, you do. Twenty minutes ago, the pharmacist from the other store called to check."

She walked back behind the shelves and asked a co-worker, "Did someone call from the other store about dietary supplement?"
The co-worker came out from behind the shelves and looked at me.
"Yes, we have that. I need to see your ID." he said, and reached for a box, and began to ring it up.
"I'd like four boxes, please." I said pleasantly.
"I can only sell you one." he replied.
"I did not see that stated on the sale tag." I countered.
"The active ingredient in this only allows us to sell one box at a time." he explained.

I took a deep breath and unleashed my inner libertarian:
"Federal law limits the daily purchase of active ingredient to 3.6 grams. This box contains .75 grams of active ingredient. Four boxes is 3 grams, which is within the limit. This is an excellent price for a product I use, and I'd like to take advantage of it."

He stared, mouth agape.
I smiled. And waited...
After about 15 seconds, he leaned forward and said, "Come back in three days. Otherwise, um..."

Yeah, they'll flag me.
Got it.

Monday, July 27, 2009

The Girl Who Lived, and Mud Party 2009

The Girl Who Lived

What an exciting weekend!
Friday night I flew in to Pittsburgh, and Saturday morning Sadie called me, all upset because she'd just wrecked the car:

so I grabbed Joey (here as Mud Party help) and headed out to save the day.

That left Ron with Jeff and Hayley as helpers, along with the completely awesome Cliff (the real saver of the day), with whom Ron had just spent a week in Vegas!

Sadie went to the ER (now called the "ED", but no one outside the "ED" calls it that) to get her head glued shut:

She's fine...

Her passenger will eventually be fine... I hope...

Three hours later, we were hosting the Mud Party!

It was a good turn-out in spite of the rain, and what a lot of people didn't know was that we have a great celebrity following. Among the guests were several well-known faces:

Is that Sonny, from I Robot?

Wasn't he in I Am Legend?

Joker Jeff, why so serious?

The Slip & Slide Slouch

Oh, yeah! She was there last year!

(When they wallow in oatmeal and spaghetti, it looks like someone vomited on them. Funny how her shirt reads, "Hurley".)

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Oh, What A Night

So tonight was an awesome night! We went to see Penn & Teller, and they were extremely entertaining. After the show, people crushed in around them, to get photos and autographs. Shelley was tall enough to get an aerial view of the crowd, and planned our route. We got to the front of the throng, and asked Teller for his autograph, and gave Ron the job of taking the photo.
After the camera flashed, Ron lowered it and it flashed again right away.
"Oh, no!" I said and snatched the camera back. This was the photo on the screen:

Fortunately, I hit review and this photo came up:

Then it was on to Penn, for another photo op:

We even gave the guys a turn:

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Vegas Variety

I started the day by going to the pool and ordering breakfast. Of course, it was 1pm, so my breakfast looked a lot like lunch. I ordered a BYO burger, with double avocado, $10, and a frozen drink called "Allure" (hard lemonade with blueberry liquor) for $8. What arrived was a 1/2 lb burger with tomato, onion, lettuce, and an entire avocado sliced on top, and mountain of fries, and a couple pickle spears. Apparently in Vegas they want you so fat you can't get off the stool in front of the slot machine! It was really yummy.
With all the aging baby boomers making Vegas their mecca, they should have some fun with the drink names. Instead of "Aphrodesiac", "Allure", "Forbidden Fruit", and "Sweet Seduction", the drink names could be "Little Blue Potion", "Hot Flash", "Hearing-ade" and "Hypogonadism".

Shelley on a raft at the pool. Raft rental is $20, so when she saw one that had been abandoned by its owner, she quickly hermit-crabbed into it.

Around 4:30, the guys joined us, just in time for happy hour, where the 32 oz drinks were only $9.

With no shade, no hat and no sunglasses, Ron was forced to salute everyone he talked to. I ran into the pool store and bought him a ballcap for $9.

For about an hour, we had shade. And I actually got cold! I was glad when the sun peeked out from around the tower.

Stolen Borrowed things are just more fun to use, ya know?

Happy Hour

Hmmm... Maybe he's compensating for something? I'm kidding! I'm a kidder!

Mountains out back of the hotel. Pic taken from elevator lobby.

We walked down to Margaritaville for dinner.

Shelley keeping the beeper for us. It was too loud to hear it go off, so she put it where she'd feel it vibrate.

Blender Girl. Every hour, she comes out and dances provacatively, then slides down a volcano into a giant blender of Margarita. She then she gets fished out by a giant fish hook and dances some more. The men were positively riveted.

Stilt guys that go around making goofy balloon hats for the diners.

Ron et al collected enough money to get me lei'd at Margaritaville. Real flowers with a very sweet scent. The money went to an organization called "Save the Ta-tas" raising money for breast cancer research.

OMFG! Shelley ordered Nachos. There was no way she could even put a dent in them, and brought the rest back in a very large take-out container.

Blender Girl dancing near our table. I love this shot- Shelley is leaning away from Blender Girl, but Cliff is staring at her ... smile?

Ron, trying to help with the nachos.

Pirate Stilt Guy. Note the peg leg.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

What Happens in Vegas...

... is the same damn thing that happened in Sarasota!

When I last wrote, I was heading off to the pool. People were complaining of the humidity (30%).
I met my traveling companion and we quickly got to work on some frozen drinks with names like, "Aphrodisiac", and "Original Sin".

The cup she is holding in her hand cost $8. (Eye candy is free.)

The view from my lounge chair, at the pool.

Part of the view from my lounge chair.

New York, New York

The plan this evening was to walk to New York, New York, so we could get dinner, and some of us could ride the roller coaster. The roller coaster track is in the foreground of the above photo.

Walking across the pedestrian bridge after dark.

I was laughing because he was pulling my hair.

Candy Apple Display in New York, New York.

Inside the restaurant area of NY,NY.

Then the oddest thing happened. It began raining!! People were coming in soaked. When it was time to walk back to our hotel, we had to walk back in cool, driving rain. We sought shelter under a construction scaffold or something. There was a young man trying to give away passes to a night club nearby. He couldn't get anyone to stop, because of the rain. We stood and watched as he unsuccessfully tried to stop dozens of people.

Many were only slowing down to take off their stiletto heels and wade barefoot through Las Vegas' finest street sludge.
After a while, we said, "You never asked us if we wanted to go to the club."

"Aw, you guys don't wanna go to no club." he answered.

"How do you know?" Shelley asked.

"I can just tell. You guys are too..." he trailed off.

"Old?" I finished for him.

He did not disagree.

I took some interesting photos of people passing by, on their way to here and there.

Standing water on the street.

Running through the tunnel.

Rain-drenched Strip.

I wonder if they had to re-mortgage their house to buy that umbrella.

A real gentleman will give his date a piggy-back ride so her feet stay dry, right?