If everyone suddenly stopped drinking, getting high, and having sex, the site would disappear.
Below are a few texts that I have actually received on my cell phone.
(614) Road trip to hillbilly hotdog in osage, wv. woo-hoo!
(614) I sat at a rotted picnic table and had a napkin designated for squishing ants. Then I forgot it was the bug napkin and wiped sweat off of my face.
(239) I didn't run from the cops. I just went out the back way, to avoid them.
(614) I didn't make it to the grocery store today, but I have new shoes and a new tattoo. That's almost as good.
(716) I was going to stop and pick up some vodka, but I took two vicodin instead. So glad I got my drinking problem under control.
(239) I might be going to jail.
(304) Your weed eater hates me.
(716) I'm not good at water basketball drunk.
(304) If this orientation has taught me anything so far, it's that there are parents far dorkier than mine.
(716) I put soap in. I mixed brands. My shits gonna smell like an ocean fresh springtime meadow.
(304) Just saw my first pair of ugg boots this year... It's all downhill after this.
(304) How do I get blood out of my bed sheets? And where do I hide the body...
(716) Mom's gone. Silence. I'm assembling a crossbow.
(614) I'm taking his parents to his cousin's house to spend lotsa time with a baby and a dog that has to be muzzled the whole time.
(304) The store called- they recalled my peas and parrots.
(304) LOL. I sent you an eyebrow.
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