Family Portrait 2010

After going around and around on themes, I made an executive decision and called it,

"Show up and look nice or so help me".

(Coming soon, "Show Up and Look Nice or So Help Me" the musical.)

Ron set the camera up to take five shots in succession, in the likely event that someone's eyes were closed. He pressed the shutter, ran into position, click-click-click-click-click, would run back and press it again.

As we were losing the light, Ron announced that it would be easier to pose all five cats and have them look at the camera than our five children. We'd had enough, so we came inside to upload all the pics. What we saw on the monitor was a surprise. The camera went out of focus and we inadvertently took several series of very blurry pictures. Another thing I discovered was that one of the children (not naming names, here) was making a face, in every shot, reminiscent of Calvin & Hobbes.

In some of the shots, Harrison was holding Oy in such a way that Oy's testicles look gigundous in the pictures.

The kids, thinking we were done, went on an ice cream run. I thought we were done and changed out of my clothes into my Mr Potato Head pants. After seeing 62 unusable pics (out of 64), I declared it "Round Two"... also known as, "Get Your Butt in Here, Shut Up and Smile or So Help Me".

Obviously, there were a few grumbles. And more than one kid flat-out refused and begged to be photo-shopped in. Another kid started crying, ruining her makeup.

I was immune to it all. I screamed, cursed, turned red in the face, and finally announced I was taking laptops and car keys if they did not obey.

Even then, we had a trouble-maker on our hands.

The Family Portrait would have been perfect

if Arden hadn't been making that face!