Walking in Weston

My in-laws live in Weston, WV. It's a quiet little town made up mostly of "old money", and "no money".

No jobs in Weston... the factories closed down, the Walmart went in on the outskirts of town, and all the family-owned stores that had been downtown for generations closed down, and became pawn shops, and the kind that sell Early American Yard Sale "antiques": Velvet Elvis, and Dogs Playing Poker.

A person can buy a house for next to nothing, then have an hour commute to the place where their job is.

While walking around I took a few photos of the architecture of this sleepy little town.

First, all the houses have to have wrought iron fences and/ or ornamental trees.

The town hosts "award-winning" tours, and so after walking around a bit, I thought I'd hand out some awards, myself.

Creepy Little Kid Statue Award

Ugh! The zombie kids with blank eyes really freak me out.

Historical Preservation with Dubious Underpinnings Award

Bring Your Kids Over for a Cookout Award

"Mom said no standing near the edge, Wayne!"

Most Phantasmagorical Lawn Ornament Award

because Carnegiea Gigantia could just pop up out of the ground in WV.

Useless Railing Award

Keeping our roofers safe since 1967. Perhaps they could donate the superfluous railing to the cookout people?

The Pizza Delivery Guy Always Finds Our House Award

Garage Kept- You're Doing it Wrong Award

What Do You Get When You Put 50 WVDOT Workers and 50 Lesbians in the Same Room Award

Yes, Your Mother Can Come Live With Us Award

You Want Me to Park My Van Where? Award

Most Over-Decorated Front Porch Award

We Built This House Out of Odd Lots Award

I Swear That House is Looking at Me Award

How the F*ck Do I Get the Groceries into the House Award

Please Don't Let the Driveway Be Icy Award

Nebbercracker Lives Here Award

Cat Lady Lives Here Award

Compensating for Something Award

This Building Will Fall into the River Award

First Amendment Award

Fences Make Good Neighbors Runner Up

Fences Make Good Neighbors Award

Ridin' Dirty Award

Ridin' Nerdy Award

That Can't Be to Code Award

Things Seen From Space Award

That's Pretty, But the Creek Always Smells Like Poop Award

Trust me on this one.

Do Not Adjust Your Set Award

Yes, this house is really painted those colors.