Your Mother Has Superfluous Adipose Tissue

My kids sit at the kitchen table and tell "yo momma" jokes, even though they have the same mother, and I'm sitting right there! They comb insulting websites for new ones, and always manage to crack me up:

yo momma so fat she rolled off both sides of the bed

yo momma so dumb she tried to put m&m's in alphabetical order

yo momma so fat every time she talks to herself it's a long distance call

yo momma so fat she downloaded cheats for the wii fit

yo momma so fat she left the house in high heels and came back in flip flops

yo momma soooooo fat, she puts mayo on her Tylenol

yo momma so fat the horse on her polo shirt is real

yo momma so fat when she steps on the scale it says "to be continued"

yo momma so fat she sells shade in the summer

yo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on her good side

yo momma so fat when she ran away they used all four sides of the milk carton

yo momma so ugly she went in a haunted house and came out with an application

yo momma so dumb when she was filling out her application it said "Emergency Contact" and she put 911