Monday, March 16, 2009

Hammer Time

We're having a Video Game Party for Harris.
Guests are invited to dress up as their favorite video game character, and a prize will be awarded for the best costume.

I admit the last time I played a video game, my 'character' was a silhouette of a tank and I could push a button to go into "invisible mode".
Things have changed, so I googled "Female Video Game Characters", and saw that there were not many characters I could identify with.

In a perfect world, I would be Laura Croft. However, it would not do anyone any good to see Laura Croft, Krispy Kreme edition, so I had to choose a different character.
I quickly discovered that most of the
female characters in video games look like porn stars- six feet tall, tiny waists, huge breasts, and legs up to here!
The ones that don't look like porn stars look like Furries.

So, I took a deep breath and googled "Fat Female Video Game Characters". (Admitting you have the problem is the first step to getting a costume.)
The first one to come up was Fat Princess. Not exactly what I was looking for!
Ever hopeful, I kept looking. Eventually, I came across a character named Sister "Hammer" Hannah, from Fable 2.



I (obviously) will need a huge hammer. A sword, and a wide, leather belt. I will need a head wrap, a gauntlet, some sort of pendant...
As for the rest of it, what am I looking at, here?
Shorts and boots? A modified version of a monk's cloak?
The good news is that if anyone disagrees with the authenticity of my costume, I can smack them with my ginormous hammer.

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