Bad Poetry Day- TODAY!

Please submit poetry of your own writing.
I want really bad poetry.
I'm talking, if-I-was-a-tree bad.
Poetry cannot begin with "roses are red, violets are blue", and there can be no references to Nantucket in your poem.
Rhyming is optional, but note that most really bad poetry rhymes in a very awkward way.

Post it with your name (in the comments section, or privately), so we can give credit where credit is due.

Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz said...

Oh freddled gruntbuggly,
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits
On a lurgid bee
That mordiously hath bitled out
Its earted jurtles
Into a rancid festering
Now the jurpling slayjid agrocurstles
Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts
And living glupules frart and slipulate
Like jowling meated liverslime
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes
And hooptiously drangle me
With crinkly bindlewurdles
Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon
See if I don't

Tiffany Staggs submits...

Wait, KFC stay in my path of fate
Am I too late.... Loving, craving you still.
I cant Hate that fat guy who waits longer in line than me
The manager opens the gate to that fried goodness at eight
And lets me in.
Maybe its wrong to wait
On food that doesn't agree with your digestive tract.
Im blinded by a food that's so far outa my league.

........................Wait.


Jonathan Lister added...

Fat guys eat so many oranges
That they bang their guts on the doorhinges

That is really really bad to me. I am seriously ashamed of that.

(as you should be! great job!- Lis)

Arden submitted:

If trees could talk to me, oh the things they would say
like oh why do you let people treat me this way?
so I say these trees are our friends they give us shade,
but look at all the things they help make
tables and chairs and legs that are fake,
and who really cares if just one tree goes missing?
They help to make sticks so we can go fishing,
but what happens when all the trees go away?
Then the world will began to fade,
so I hope the trees never talk to me
because I like chairs to sit on while I drink my coffee.

Tiffany Staggs- one more:

That light
I like pie
in the sky
full of guys
in a pie tin
filled with men and a hen
to give the men company
to the light in the sky filled with guys
that i buy in hopes that the light
will shine bright one special guy
(bonus= smell like pie)